itch.io

Interesting and unique game. Only thing missing would be some cleaner writing and an ending where you cut the Liars face off, to give it back to God.

Cute character and art, though the writing leaves much to be desired. Do there happen to be any more intimate scenes with him?

Very mature

Right, 'pologies for that one. 

What do you mean, exactly?

Why was my critizism deleted? That's really insecure, dear dev

Surprisingly competent writing and presentation. The dialogue is very authentic too. Is the dev of this game a NEET herself?

I find the game to be kind of lazily made, no offense. The clothes are just pngs (in some cases not even properly cropped) that don't even register/snap into place when you drag them over the respective bodyparts. The boy also shows no reaction to anything you put on him at all, so that's a letdown as well. You're essentially just dragging pngs across the screen.

Also, the music suddenly kicks in 10-15 seconds into the game.

I'd like the game if it had actual clothing placement and if the boy had dynamic reactions to what you're doing, otherwise it's hardly a proper "dress-up" game.

Hey. I like the concept, but in it's current state, I find the game to be nigh unplayable and very lackluster. Let's start with the logical errors: Why is a person convicted of treason forcibly drafted to enact death sentences on criminals? I think the fate of such people, especially in 1776 Boston, would be to hang from the very same rope that we make others swing from ingame. What's more, why would you place the responsibility of deciding over life or death into the hands of a person with potentially high criminal energy? What's more, how does the Mayor, who should purely legally and administratively speaking not even be responsible for and capable of critizising our decisions, know wether or not the person was innocent but only after we hung them? Why doesn't HE execute said criminals, if he's so all-wise instead of making a traitor like us do it? What's more, the evidence in all of these cases was lacking, absolutely insufficient to persecute or even suspect anyone for, let alone EXECUTE (!), not even in the late 1700s was the American Justice System that bad. The historic context of it being set in Colonial America, which, on principle, could've made the game interesting, was awkwardly inserted, and the aestethics (the papers, drawings, the language, etc.) do not abide by it, which makes it seem incredibly inauthenthic and jarring.

From the way the cases are presented, and with the lack of evidence to collect in every single one of them, it is impossible to convict anyone with any degree of certainty, which, in this type of game, is an absolute dealbreaker. The only way for us to do the moral thing is to KNOW who we need to execute, rather than simply doing guesswork and having an all-knowing diety of a mayor tell us wether we were right. This all-knowing mayor also happens to be incredibly tolerant, because our criminal record as a traitor not withstanding, we are permitted to keep our job despite executing two innocents in a row, and being let go with a slap on the wrist. What sense does this make to you, dear developer?

I apologize if this may have come off as a rant, or rude; I merely want to draw your attention to the glaring flaws so that you may work on them and make an actually good and interesting game out of this.

(SPOILER WARNING)

Hello Ronove,

So, today I played the game on stream with my girlfriend, and I couldn't help but leave a comment.

I would like to begin by stating that the presentation, in artstyle and design (especially the pixel art) was to my liking and that it has a lot of potential. It's clear that passion and effort have been put into it and that theres room for much more.

However, as a game, it was an underwhelming experience. All the story elements (Characters, Plot, Social commentary, etc.) were very barebones and had little to no impact; partially because the game was so short, but mostly due to surface-level writing.

CHARACTERS

The relationship between the Sorcerer and his apprentice, clearly meant to depict an abusive dependancy, fell totally flat, because the bond between the two was hardly ever expanded upon. Ingame, the apprentice was nothing but a magic tool, meant to serve a very simple and almost menial purpose, to be put to sleep once said purpose had been fulfilled (for what reason? Why couldn't he simply been kept awake? Surely it would've been useful to have another skilled necromancer at hand?). The relationship between him and the Sorcerer, implied to be much more deeper and with a lot more backstory (including romantic baggage very transparently hinted at in the dialogue) was never explained or shown. This makes both characters feel incredibly shallow and the plot all the more unimpactful. The other characters, only seen ingame as Skeletons, are nothing but a few contextual lines of dialogue to us, therefore, we, as the player, cannot have any form of bond towards them, making the scenes in which they are resurrected emotionally meaningless.

PLOT

When it comes to the actual plot, there were several inconsistencies. For one; the character suffers from very selective amnesia, left with just enough memories to love his master and know that they have been ordered to resurrect him, but not with enough memories to realize the ultimate futility of what they're doing, only enough to carve and write very cryptic notes that could've been much more straightforward. Only due to player intervention does he suddenly realize the loop he is in, and then decide to leave his master behind forever and simply leave with no regrets, which, considering his seemingly deep adoration for him, is strange and not in character. (By the way; if he's supposed to hide his necromancy prowess, why does he decide to walk around with a gang full of spooky scary skeletons? Shouldn't that raise some eyebrows?).

About the nymphs - their barters with the necromancer don't make much sense. Why are they willing to trade one of theirs for an object as mundane as a handheld mirror? What would they use it for if they are dead? Are they a hivemind-collective that values a slightly valuable item over a "drone"? What's more, when the Protag decided to not take her life after all, the unredeemed gift was simply ignored, and the nymph asked for an additional (!) item to give him very general advice.

The memories our character goes through clearly depict a time when he lived as an apprentice under the masters overlordship along with the rest of the court in a much more conventional setting. However, at some point, the implied Battle happened, and the master decided to use him as a human battery for magic storage. However - at the point of the game - the battle happened centuries in the past and there is no imminent threat to the mansion and/or its inhabitants. So why does the Master decide to simply put us into a magically induced coma the second we raise him from the dead? Why can't we just keep going like before, until he has his army assembled again? It just makes him look like a Dick for no conceivable reason, which is doubly weird, because he does display some affection for the protagonist. Which leads us to the third point.

SOCIAL COMMENTARY

If im not totally mistaken, then a central theme of this short game would definetly be abusive relationships and independence. There are two endings, and although they are never classified as good or bad, it's very clear which one's which. In the good ending, the Protag leaves behind the tutelage of his abusive master (possibly boyfriend) to pursue an independent existence. In the bad one, he is put to sleep, to be used again as insurance, should the battle for the "World" (whatever that means) go wrong for the Xth time (by the way, why doesn't the Master ever change his strategy in the face of all these failures? Is he stupid? And why do his enemies never realize that leaving him as a fully intact skeleton on the altair inevitably leads to his resurrection? Why don't they just burn his body and dispose of the ashes into the ocean or something? Or maybe just behead him? Without a skull, a resurrection doesn't work after all, as clearly stated ingame). The main problem with how the relationship at hand is depicted is that the Sorcerer is a one-dimensional villainous conqueror who uses the Protag as nothing but a tool for his ambitions, which stands in almost total contrast to how he has been portrayed in the memories. Even though his manipulative personality does shine through, there are plenty of hints and dialogue cues scattered about that imply an intricate and even romantic bond to the Protag. All of this, however, is not just never expanded upon, it is totally thrown away in the bad ending, undoing the built up plot, and in the good ending too, by merit of the Protag simply abandoning his master. Not only does this make the games characters impossible feel attached to, it also makes abusive relationships seem dangerously easy to see through and likens abusers in such relationships to cartoonish villains that can be easily distinguished and discarded, and getting away from them is presented as an easy act, which it never is.

This game had a lot of premise. Intriguing characters and setting, good art, etc., but it failed to build and deliver on all of that. Why? The relationship between the Protag and the Master, and even the rest of the court, could've been definetly expanded on and imbedded into a more satisfying and deeper plot. I'm genuinely lost as to why it was all dropped for a very short and lackluster experience, when it had the potential for so much more. It didn't become bad, until I realized - "Hey, wait, that's it? That's all?"

Either way - given the contrast between the writing, and the presentation, I couldn't help but feel the need to write this well-intentioned piece of criticism, in hopes that you will take it well, and that you may use it to improve your work further.